i'm only going to say this once (or type this once, but if i only type it once, it still gets transmitted hundreds of times, or if it's on my xanga, about five times, that's how many people still read this, and i'm one of them):

Ashton Kutcher is a fucking genius.

I don't know if you've thought about "The Butterfly Effect" in a deep and meaningful way or anything, but everytime he tries to make the world better from his perspective, the world gets even more fucked up. Only when he tries to make it so that he can't hurt the one he thinks he's supposed to be with for the rest of his life does his life stop getting messed up.

So, in other words: Self-sacrifice or altruism rather than self-interest (or indulgence) makes the world a better place.

Bravo Ashton, you're more than misunderstood, you're the unrecognized American Hero.

P.S. I was going to say "Unrecognized North American Hero", but Canada is already upset that Wayne Gretzky gets no love. Solidarity brother.

You know what would be sooooo useful that somebody could make millions of dollars selling? A birthday present wheel of some sort. Combining all sorts of factors to select the perfect gift. For example, you match up the information for a Buddhist who ADORES dogs and likes football and you get....something meaningful that I should have thought of by now because that's who I have to buy a present for.

So I just went to a Black Eyed Peas concert.

I'm sorry to the people who told me it was going to be shit, I almost believed you. It was awesome. I mean, they might not sound as good live as they do on their cd, but I never had a problem with people digitally working their voices. As long as they can work a crowd, I'm okay with them.

Actually getting in was a pain. Dude made me put the chain that's attached to my wallet in the cloak room. Yeah, a 7-inch length of chain is apparently dangerous. I tend to think that it's because I'm Asian, and anything in my hands is a potentially deadly weapon of mass destruction. Oh wait, I'm confusing Asian with NINJA.

And then some people came later then others and couldn't get into our section because they didn't have the proper armband. So I ended up smuggling them in one at a time with the ONLY ARMBAND THAT DIDN'T BREAK APART WHEN PULLED OFF SOMEONE ELSE.

I aM sO aSiAn RiGhT nOw.

There was a girl who flashed them in order to get a T-shirt, they threw her one and the girl behind her caught it. She looked really disappointed and I felt bad for her. Almost as bad as when I threw Timmy down the well. But on reflection Timmy deserved it. He stole my pony. And people who steal ponies deserve a penalty worse than death. Which is obviously being thrown down a well. And living.

I was going to bitch about my life, but then I kind of thought about it and realized that my friends are having shittier times in uni right now, and all things considered I've had it pretty light.

I mean, it's pretty tough to bitch about "not being motivated" when you could've been born with AIDS with a nine-year-old mother as the product of rape.

So here's a short list of what's good in my life right now:

1) Apparently I have a stalker/stalker-ish person. I wonder if I'm the first in the class of 2003 to get one. If I had a time machine right now, I'd go back in time and amend my yearbook comments "Most likely to get a stalker first"
2) I have a friend called "Waterfall" (Life doesn't get much better than that)
3) I just found another chillout song, rock on, wild one.
4) I took my accounting quiz, guessed all the answers, and probably didn't fail.
5) I'm in Australia having fun, whereas I could've been in England freezing my ass off or America having my ass shot off. (Don't even talk to me about Canada...or Europe)
6) It may be winter, but I have my heater on and apparently the cost is shared amongst the flats in my unit HAHAHAH 30 DEGREES IN 7 DEGREE WEATHER HERE I COME BITCH.

That's all folks.